What body part do you miss?

By the time you hit 60 on up, you will have a parts problem. It’s the Inner Jalopy emerging. Are you becoming a clunker?

Well, I guarantee you will miss some physical part of yourself, something you used to enjoy (maybe a great head of hair) or something you just took for granted—creakless knees, for instance. And this evaporation of your parts or their function has probably made the heart grow fonder. Oh, how you miss the good old days of a bladder that would sleep through the night or a member that was always present and accounted for, not AWOL.

I know which parts of myself have gone missing—I miss just getting up from a chair, instead of unfolding—but I was curious about others. So I asked some of the women I went to college with—my social convey as we head together through the rougher waters of age. And I polled the men I know well enough to extract some truth.

Well, some of the women missed the hands they used to have.

Photo: Batezer

Slender, unknobby, no pain, could open bottles and jars and peanut packages on airplanes. Others noted that their hands are becoming their mother’s hands. I know when I look down I wonder for a second who my hands belong to. They are not mine. Anybody here missing hands?

By Freeparking

Others missed their hair. They felt betrayed by their follicles. If we older adults gave a stage show now, it wouldn’t be called Hair. It would be called Bald. No more the Age of Aquarius. More the Age of Rogaine.

Then there were those—most of us—who missed their waistlines. Old waistlines never die, they just expand. And if you read the health news, people who have large waistlines do die earlier than those with Scarlett O’Hara waists. (That statistic is hard to remember when someone hands you a piece of chocolate cake.)

Still others—women only—missed breasts that pointed straight ahead. Gravity will have its way with the mammaries and frankly, just when we could use a lift, some of us are tired of wearing the harnesses called bras. Don’t be surprised if you see a news photo of a woman burning her bra down in the parking lot of the senior center.

That would be me.

And then, among the most missed body parts were knees that worked.

By Jesse.millan

People who used to run can’t do marathons anymore. Too many years of pounding hard surfaces. But and however, many I know have enjoyed the miracle of a knee replacement—which should be done only by a highly experienced surgeon who comes well-recommended. The hospital itself should have much op and post-op experience with replaced knees. I know you didn’t ask about this, but so many people march off to surgery in a state of blind trust. Part of the process of growing older should be pre-surgical homework and part of the process of writing a diary is that you can interrupt yourself.

Now brains came out a big winner in the missing parts division. People said they missed their formerly acute memories.  This causes much distress among older people. My guess is it’s not so much the pain of not remembering names at a party—been there, done that a lot. It’s the fear of losing more memory.

The Ghost of Alzheimer’s stalks our halls these days. Tonight’s news announced a new test—a spinal tap—to see if you were likely to get Alzheimer’s. But do we want to get our spines tapped in order to learn we will get a disease for which there is no cure?

Me, I’m not lining up. 

By brainblogger

Anyhow, I don’t think there is one older person who doesn’t miss some part of his or her former self. Still, people seemed either resigned or cheerful about their situations. I know for me there are great benefits to having a bit of age—just like a cheese or a wine.

I am not as hurried. I can say what I think and write this Geezer Diary for instance. Most of all, I know more about people and the world. Some may call it wisdom. I call it just living long enough.

Oh, heck, go ahead. Let’s call it wisdom.  Something has to make up for the knees.

By Mark Robinson

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3 Responses to What body part do you miss?

  1. Sara says:

    Maybe you can add a PS about the brain scan test now being touted to detect early Alzheimer’s before the symptoms even appear (100% reliable according to the morning paper). What will this mean for us? More expensive health care costs? More radiation in our bodies (brains)? More knowledge of what’s to come? More time to prepare? Anything good here? I’d be interested in what you know/learn about this. Thanks.

  2. Beverly says:

    I think having a spinal tap is a serious medical test, and not one anyone (at least myself) should undergo except for a better reason than finding out if one is at risk for alzheimer’s.

  3. Debbie B says:

    The fear of losing my memory is high on the list. There is not much we can really do to change what the future holds for any of us. Do I really want to know if I am going to have Alzheimer’s, a heart attack, stroke or cancer? No, I think not. We need to enjoy our time and not dwell on our aging bodies. Look to the positive. What will be, will be. P.S. already went through cancer, done that, now single breasted. Wished I had the other one removed too, then would go without a bra. How liberating that would be!

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